The short naps are developmentally normal at this age because they can’t link sleep cycles (it’s part of the 4mo sleep regression). You’re lucky she’s still sleeping through the night! It’s so tough though
My LO is 4 months old and is having a really hard time falling asleep independently. She has become very dependent on motion, and we have to rock and walk with her every single time she needs to sleep.
For some background, she was extremely colicky during her first few months. Rocking and walking were often the only ways we could calm and settle her, so we naturally relied on motion to help her sleep. Now that her colic has improved, it seems she has become very accustomed to being rocked to sleep and doesn't know how to fall asleep any other way.
Lately, she's been getting extremely cranky if we don't put her down as soon as she shows signs of being tired. We often spend close to an hour rocking her, only for her to nap for about 30 minutes. She then wakes up, plays for 10–15 minutes, becomes overtired, and starts crying again until we rock her back to sleep. This cycle keeps repeating throughout the day and is becoming quite exhausting for us.
I feel like her inability to fall asleep independently is also causing her to wake frequently from her naps.
The only positive is that she sleeps through the night, so our main challenge is helping her learn to fall asleep on her own during the day.
Has anyone been through something similar?
Any tips would be of great help
P.S. “Drowsy but awake” has never worked for us.
The short naps are developmentally normal at this age because they can’t link sleep cycles (it’s part of the 4mo sleep regression). You’re lucky she’s still sleeping through the night! It’s so tough though
Drowsy but awake didn’t stand a chance in our house till around 7.5 months and even then, it worked maybe 1/3 of the time. At 4 months, baby’s nervous system is underdeveloped and they rely on you to co-regulate. If she’s not staying asleep, it makes me think she’s simply not tired enough. As far as the rocking, my daughter just slowly stopped needing/wanting to be rocked and bounced like crazy. We sway in a nursery rocker sometimes at 9.5 months. 4 months is notoriously hard in terms of sleep so hang in there! They have big developmental leaps around that age because their sleep cycles are maturing. Our “regression” lasted about 3 weeks (around weeks 15-18).
We started setting ours down for 5 minutes when she shows signs of being sleepy, just straight into the crib, she falls asleep like 70-80% of the time before the 5 minutes are up. Obvs making sure she's full, clean diaper, burped etc. It's been a game changer.
I’d try getting her a bouncer that she can bounce herself in hopes the novelty will wear off and she can self sooth using it for naps if needed should take your workload down at least.
We use this one https://www.amazon.com/BabyBj%C3%B6rn-Bouncer-Balance-Woven-Jersey/dp/B0CLV64H9L/ref=sxin_23_pa_sp_phone_search_thematic_sspa? Her daycare seems to also use a bouncer for her they use: https://www.amazon.com/Ergobaby-Bouncer-Adjustable-Position-Newborn/dp/B0BF31VXSX/ref=mp_s_a_1_3
Babies’ time in containers should be limited to necessary car travel plus no more than 1 extra hour per day, because it impedes their gross motor development and can increase the chance of developing flat spots in their heads. And it is never safe to let them sleep in a container like a bouncer, either. If your daycare lets her sleep in a bouncer, that is almost certainly a reportable violation. https://health.clevelandclinic.org/container-baby-syndrome
My daughter napped like five times a day at that age, 30 min on the dot every time. I really think it’s just your kid’s age and stage of development
Exact same situation as you. We transitioned to feeding and rocking her until she's drowsy and setting her down awake but drowsy 90% of the time she goes to sleep on her own. We started this at 5 months.
Our LO also loves to be rocked to sleep. While we stand. And walk around. A real motion junkie. We’ve crossed the threshold to near-independent sleep and the key was back pats. Lots and lots of back pats.
I agree with others that she may not be tired enough if it’s taking so long to rock to sleep. At 4 months, my guy became so fussy due to teething and more awareness of the world. For a while we thought it was tiredness. We found that taking him out into the world while he was awake helped stimulate him so he was less fussy and more tired for naps. Are you able to extend naps by finishing them as a contact nap? It’s such a tough age. Wishing you the best!
Put them in their bed. Clean, dry, safe, full and let them work it out with themselves it sound harsh, but it works
How many times did you try drowsy but awake? How long did you let them fuss/cry? Independent sleep is a skill that must be learned, and that requires practice, just like anything else. After about 7 days straight of laying down awake for every nap/sleep, failing horribly every time, our LO finally began to fall asleep on his own. This continued off and on for 4 more weeks before he finally had a (near) 100% success rate. It takes time and practice. Common mistake to give up too early!
You could try feeding to sleep. It’s been working so incredibly well for us for almost a year. It might be somewhat controversial, but it works for a lot of families.
Drowsy but awake was possible for us around 9 months old (when she’s truly tired, of course).
It’s so wild that this is a controversial take lol. It’s literally what the biology of feeding is designed to do, that’s why it works. I hate that so many of us have been duped into thinking that’s a problem or a bad habit when we literally evolved for that to work. If it’s a problem for the parent then sure, don’t do jt, but so many people are told that it inherently is a problem and try to stop feeding to sleep even when it’s working well! Every human in all of history has figured out how to fall asleep without a boob in their mouth, long before 20th and 21st century westerners started telling people they had to take special steps to break the habit.
Why are you concerned about a 4 month old needing to be rocked to sleep? It’s beyond developmentally normal now and beyond? Independent sleep isn’t the issue here. Your baby is normal. Feed or rock to sleep.