Hello,
I am new to meditation. I tried some guided meditation ( Joe Dispenza, Yoda Nidra, sleep relaxation ) and not guided ones ( basically Yoga Nidra or Noting on my own ) for approximately 20 min per session, and, while I can calm my thought and am not that anxious, I can’t relax.
To add more context, I am in chronic fight or flight / tired but wired mode so what I call “few anxiety” might be a lot anxiety which I am used to. My heartbeat after meditation, lying down, is still 73, while my regular heartbeat lying down is 80. This is mainly bc of fight or flight.
But I don’t get anxious thoughts.
What should I do ? Is it “useless” ( I meditate to help calm down my fight or flight ) if I can’t really calm down ?
Thanks
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This obviously depends on your goal with meditation, but most meditations arent focused on relaxing. Keeping your focus on for example your breath and nothing else does, and should, take quite a bit of effort and focus. If it is just relaxation you are looking for there are plenty of other relaxation excercises.
honestly that "tired but wired" thing resonates — i've been there, and meditation felt kind of pointless until i realized my baseline was just... broken. maybe it's working even if your heart rate's only dropping a few bpm, i mean.
So, if you're in a chronic state of hyperarousal, a 20-minute yoga nidra may not cut it. It took me 2+ hours per day of practice over 3 months and 180+ hours of cumulative practice to heal my sleep and a variety of chronic treatment-resistant mood disorders. As such, part of it will be simply putting in the hours so that the effects can build up and compound in themselves. Moreover, using the same recording over and over again for yoga nidra will not expose you to the variety of techniques from each lineage that can help you calm down your nervous system. The Satyananda, Amrit, iRest, Himalayan/Rama, etc. styles of yoga nidra each emphasize different variations of the practice, and preparatory practices can boost the effects by a lot. Next, you will also need to address other areas of your life that may be potential sources of stress. Meditations won't correct nutrient deficiencies, total social isolation, a toxic work environment, an abusive relationship, poor interpersonal boundaries with friends and coworkers and bosses and family members and romantic partners, poor money management, exposure to pollution, poor sleep, etc.
For specifically targeting your anxiety, breathing techniques may be more helpful for immediate relief. Box breathing (inhale 4, hold 4, exhale 4, holdempty 4) or 4 7 8 breath (inhale 4, hold 7, exhale 8), are designed to help calm the body.or Nadi shodina (alternite nostril breathing)
Maybe practice breathing technique to calm, before meditation.
Meditation wise, just observe the breath and sensation of breathing, don't control the breath just observe. If thoughts or feelings arise or overwhelm, when you finally recognize it just set them aside to the breath.
Wanna go deeper, I do Vipassana meditation, they have 10day silent courses all over the world, depends on how bad your anxiety is, but not having to talk or have a phone really helped me alot. Dhammdhamma.org theyre actually free/donation based. Good foundation for meditation