When I was 33, my mom worked as a public accountant at a CPA firm. One of the partners, who I’ll call Megan, also led a ministry at her church, which had something to do with helping moms and families in need. According to my mom, Megan regularly asked her to spend hours each week doing church volunteer work on top of her already demanding 40–50+ hour work weeks as an auditor.
My mom kept asking me to help whenever we saw each other (we live in the same city) because most of the volunteers were out of town for the Fourth of July weekend. I eventually agreed and spent about eight hours that Sunday in the July heat moving boxes and small furniture for the church.
Afterward, Megan tried to set me up with a woman from the church who was eight months pregnant and single at 23 because she thought we’d be a perfect match. I was completely caught off guard. I couldn’t help but think this was somehow a part of her “ministry”.
Around that same time, my mom told me she had worked at the firm for more than ten years without employer-provided health insurance. She later left for a better-paying job with benefits and eventually landed a senior accountant position at a company Megan had always wanted to work for.
When my mom needed a reference, she said Megan ignored her until another partner at the firm agreed to provide one. Only then did Megan finally call to give the reference.
Looking back, it seems like the boundaries between employer, church leader, and personal life were almost nonexistent, and my mom’s willingness to help was taken for granted.
TL;DR: My mom’s boss (“Megan”) had her doing church volunteer work on top of long hours as an auditor, recruited me for a full day of unpaid labor, then tried to set me up with an eight-month-pregnant single woman from the church. My mom later left for a better job with health insurance, and Megan initially ignored her request for a professional reference.
She tried to set you up with a pregnant woman? You mean to date? That's pretty weird.
Yes, I mean to date. Agreed. Extremely weird.
Couldn't get her any more pregnant.
Kid needs a dad so why not provide one for them that Megan can control through his mum?
Megan the Ministry Matchmaker 😳 Thank God your Mom escaped!
It almost sounds like a cult.
Haha, yikes! I love the name though!
I’m not taking the boss’s side or anything, but why did your mom agree to do the church volunteer stuff? you’re making it seem like your mom had her work hours, and then her boss told her to also volunteer at a church, which your mom said yes too? i hope this doesn’t come across as condescending but isn’t that kinda your moms fault? she either did it because she genuinely wanted to, but if she only did it because her boss asked her, isn’t that a bit of an ass kisser move on her part? it still makes your boss entitled to ask her to do this, it just seems kinda dumb for your mom to do it unless she genuinely wanted to
I edited the post with more relevant details that I got from refreshing my memory on this by talking to my mom this morning. According to my mom, she initially volunteered out of kindness, but then Megan kept asking for more and more of her time — unpaid time. Once my mom finally pushed back, my sister started hearing derogatory comments about our mom from Megan. My mom and sister continued volunteering their time out of fear that Megan might fire our mom. My sister was living with our mom at the time.
seems like megan had a hard time separating being a boss, a church leader, and someone asking for personal favors. your mom was probably way too generous with her time
Yikes. Glad she escaped and is better off.
"I'm sorry I don't partake in cult activities."
Exactly where are the entitled people in the story?
[removed]
Whenever I read about people mixing work with their church membership, I always feel it's a mistake. There is too much room for abuse.
Megan sounds like a real piece of work, pushing your mom to volunteer while not even providing health insurance. Just wild how entitled some bosses can be.