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Status was everything... And still is to so many... People will get uncomfortable when I treat them as an equal.. took me a long time to realise I had less status then they did (according to their rules) and often they simply wrote me off as 'not understanding the way society operated' ... Crazy ignorant, rebellious, backwards, any number of descriptives to convince themselves they were right ... And yes, bottom line, was probably about control
We live in a society that conditions competition in a hierarchy... a hierarchy formulated toward dominance and submission. Dominant people require submissive ones to feel secure about themselves. If you lose that submissive mentality... They get uneasy.
Well, I agree to this as long as there is a mutual respect and understanding. I wouldn’t say entirely “submissive”, as that implies being entirely dependent. Although, I think I know what you mean (think\*). There should be a balance, of course disproportionately portioned correctly. Understanding the roles in the dynamic of relationships (any regard), you hold in which aspects of your and others lives. It isn’t so much control, unless you let it be. It is guidance and strong suit(s) ones hold, the other doesn’t. It should not be a matter of power clashes. I hope I read your message to its the point. Irregardless of, my input on positions we hold in life. Briefly. .
Yes lol
A relationship with a former friend got to the point where through our dynamic I had deep intuitive insight into his worldview and how he operates, and the mask he wears vs. what is underneath. After a confrontation that revealed how he felt entitled to control my behaviour and a couple of dodged requests for repair that exposed manipulative avoidance - along with more entitlement to control - I let him know exactly where I stood and what my boundaries are, while also leaving the door open for an honest conversation but with the ball in his court - and completely removed myself from the relationship. Upon reflection I don't believe he is currently capable of honest repair. I saw him today, I went and sat in the same backyard space he was in and completely ignored him. It wasn't long before he left.