Dear NG91Films,
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TLDR: I became fast friends with someone and we spoke/hung out a lot but lately it suddenly changed and it’s been stressing me out.
So I have a friend who I met through a shared hobby and we became pretty close over the course of a couple of months due to the frequency we were just seeing each other due to said hobby. We’re both in a few different group chats with each other and have quite frankly seen and spoke to each other a lot. Either we goof around a lot or sidebar at events when in person, and then we’ll send each other memes over text throughout the day, and usually would vent to each other over little things even not related to our most common shared interest.
We wound up seeing quite a lot of each other over the past couple of months and it was mostly really great, but over the last few weeks I started noticing little changes. Normally, we would see each other at an event and usually they’d come up to me almost immediately and it’d feel very warm. But lately it’s almost always a short hi from a distance and nothing more. Sometimes if I go up to them, they’d barely engage in the conversation and walk over to someone else, and whenever I attempted to initiate some of the ways in which we’d joke around with each other, they’d suddenly not be into it. But they were acting totally normal with the others who are in our same group chats.
They’ve definitely engaged in the group chats less and less in general, but then I noticed over the past week, while they would still talk in the chats, I noticed everything I sent they were not acknowledging. If I sent a message or a meme, they’d be silent but would respond immediately to someone else. So clearly it seems like I’m being ignored and their rapport with other friends who we’ve seen just as frequently seems to remain unchanged.
I tend to be a little weary about friendships that ramp up over the course of a short period of time just because I feel they can end just as quickly but also this person has repeatedly expressed how much our friendship means to them, even texting me at one point when they felt something got weird (before all this) and wanted to clear the air quickly so there was no tension between us. So should I do the same in this instance? I get worried I’m overthinking it but the sudden change has been weighing on me.
Dear NG91Films,
Your post on r/socialskills was removed by the Read The Rules app because you need to submit an acknowledgement that you have read the rules. You can submit an acknowledgement by clicking the link below.